The Lost Socratic Dialogue — Aikaterina

Historian’s note: Another lost dialogue of Socrates has been found. This one bears a similar character to another recently discovered dialogue: Ilioloustos.

THE LOST SOCRATIC DIALOGUE — AIKATERINA

(Socrates is walking through the atrium at Athens where he sees a woman speaking to a crowd on the steps. He approaches and observes.)

AIKATERINA: (Speaking on the steps at the atrium to a group of people) Listen, Athenians. There are two kinds of people in this world! There are those who have been through it and think because they went through it you should have to go through it too, and there are those who have been through it and because they know what it’s like will try to prevent you from having to go through it too. Be the second kind of person.

(There is applause from the crowd)

DONPHILO: Yes! That is the truth!

SEPADEPTUM: Thank you for this keen insight, Aikaterina!

XUPHUM: I am telling this to my family as soon as I get home!

SOCRATES: This depends on what *it* is, does it not?

AIKTERINA: It’s pretty obvious that *it* means “struggle”, Socrates. Be the kind of person who doesn’t let others go through struggles.

SOCRATES: I assumed as much. What I mean is that the nature of the struggle determines whether or not we should let others experience it or try to prevent them from going through it. A struggle can be a great thing for a person, and can help them develop fortitude, insight, problem solving abilities, resilience, and a better attitude toward lesser struggles that will inevitably occur in life. You cannot prevent anyone from experiencing all the struggles they will encounter, nor would you want to. If you prevent someone from having any struggles, you aren’t helping them become a full person, you are hindering their development. 

If the struggle is terrible and unnecessary, then it seems acceptable to strive to be the kind of person who helps others avoid it. But we can see that isn’t always the best course. It depends on the struggle.

(The crowd disperses with a few more claps and shouts of appreciation at Aikaterina’s words, before she too departs.)

(On his way home that night Socrates passes through an alleyway. A figure steps out from the shadows. It is Aikaterina.)

AIKATERINA: Next time you want to be a contrarian asshole don’t bother doing it to me. I was hurt by you long ago when you didn’t return my love, and you are hurting me again. Don’t disagree with me again. Thanks.

SOCRATES: Do you mean the disagreement at the atrium today? I wasn’t trying to be a contrarian, that was a genuine disagreement. If disagreeing with a false dichotomy and disagreeing that a life free of any struggle is a positive thing looks like contrarianism to you, I am sorry.

AIKATERINA: Look at you. If you think I care what you think with your hundred dollar words then you’re wrong. Night watchman!

(A night watchman approaches and Aikaterina files for a restraining order against Socrates. They both return to their homes.)

THE END

Historian’s second note: This dialogue shares the same peculiarities found in the Ilioloustos dialogue, in that it is strikingly modern and in the form of a realistic dialogue where one party is doing more talking than thinking, and Socrates is barred from further communication with this person after posing what looks like a mild challenge to relatively unremarkable ideas. Also of note is that, like Ilioloustos, Aikaterina is a woman, a rarity in Ancient Greek philosophy. Once again a modern scholar might wonder if this dialogue, written either by Plato or Xenophon, or maybe some mysterious third author, was intended to portray a sexist view of women. It is likely this dialogue was written by the Ilioloustos author, and since both dialogues can be taken to show women behaving in ways that are consistent with sexist portrayals, one has to wonder if this portrayal was an invention of the author. One does not want to be presumptuous and conclude that because of its realism it was taken directly from a real experience.