Monday, September 24, 2012

The Poppertawns

Synopsis: A family learns valuable lessons about love, both platonic and romantic, and learns the truth about death, drugs, sibling rivalry, and psychic abilities while their individual desires get in the way. 




Three grown men sat at an umbrella-covered table at the county fair. Each was thirty years old. They looked similar in the face. Not far from their table a young black woman was breastfeeding her child. The men watched closely from the shade, as the sun drenched the earth around them.
“White kids go for a lot on the black market,” said one of the men, the one with a light blue sports coat clashing with his yellow shorts. His name was Sigurd. “They’re considered a commodity.” He bit into his soft pretzel and decided it wasn’t soft enough.
“Doubt that very much,” said one of the other men, the one wearing sunglasses. His name was Sigfried. He eyeballed Sigurd’s soft pretzel and took a sip of Diet Cherry Shasta.
“Why? It’s true. People are buyin’ white kids all the time. Not for sex and stuff, or as slaves, but for kids. Like, as  their own kids. Some people can’t have children so they gotta buy ‘em. And some people get boyfriends or girlfriends there. Husbands and wives and that kinda thing.”
The third man spoke up. He wore a gold chain around his neck and was using his fingers to spread ketchup on his hotdog. His name was Sigmund. “Nah, man. White kids might be popular there, but it’s black kids they really want. Why you think it’s called a black market? People want black kids.”
“That’s not what black market means,” said Sigfried. “It’s black like mystery, like the shadows.”
“Color ain’t important,” Sigurd said. “You could call it a red market and white kids would still be the most sought after children in the whole thing.”
“Sounds like bullshit to me.” Sigmund said, shoveling the hotdog into his wet mouth.
“Fuck off. Jonathan told me all about it. You calling Jonathan a liar?”
“I’m callin’ you a liar,” Sigmund replied, moist chunks of hotdog falling out of his mouth. The chunks landed on his gut resting on the table.
“Jonathan never told me shit about black markets,” Sigfried said.
The young mother pulled her child’s lips off her nipple, and tucked her breast back into her shirt. She stuck a pacifier into the child’s mouth and strapped the little guy into a stroller.
“Show’s over,” Sigfried mumbled. He handed his Diet Cherry Shasta to Sigmund and Sigmund handed the half-eaten hotdog to him. They consumed the exchanged food and drink.
“Ya’ll some racist motherfuckers,” the woman muttered as she pushed the stroller by, not stopping to wait for a response.
“The fuck?” Sigurd was upset. “That ain’t racist. How’s that racist?”
“It ain’t,” Sigmund said, Diet Cherry Shasta dripping down his chin. “Jonathan woulda said somethin’ if it was racist.”
The men finished their food and drinks, and spent the rest of the day at the fair soaking in the hot sun, and enjoying the over six-hundred advertisements placed strategically around the fairgrounds, obscuring all but the most flashy and sketchy vendors and activity booths.           

***

Sigmund, Sigfried, and Sigurd were quadruplets. Three quarters of quadruplets, that is. Their fourth brother died at birth. His name was Jonathan. If one were to ask the living brothers what the best part about being quadruplets was, they would tell you it was the ability to communicate with their dead brother. Psychic communication from beyond the grave, they would say, was just one of many attributes quadruplets had with which those of a singular birth are not endowed.
The brothers lived together in a mobile home not far from a cheap diner and even less far from a landfill. The smells that wafted toward them and met outside their door filled their home with the very essence that defined their existence. Each brother had moved out of Mom and Dad’s house separately, within the same month.
“Shut up, Mom and Dad,” Sigmund had yelled one evening after an argument about his future and his girlfriend. “ I'm staying at Ford Bluckins Community College and marrying my best friend, Tan Blaiynes.” His defiance in the face of authority was nothing new, but this time it meant freedom. He wouldn’t go to the university like his parents demanded, and he wouldn’t break up with his long-term girlfriend of three weeks just because she brought out his inner animal. No. Sigmund like community college, and he liked Tan’s effects on his personality. He was an animal, and she knew it. Sigmund left home that night to find a new place to live. His parents called after him, with shouts of, “We only want to protect you!” and, “We want what’s best for you, Sigmund!” But these words fell on ears deafened by lust and hope and the tinted windows of a 1985 Buick LaSabre. The car sped away, rocketing Sigmund to a new life.
Only a week later, Sigfried was asked to leave the house when mom and dad found every entrance to the house covered in spider webs. When more spider webs were found around Sigfried’s bedroom door, and spiders the size of baseballs were discovered nestled inside, devouring apples and coffee beans, corpses of bugs of all sizes weaved into the webbing, it was the last straw. Sigfried would have to take his spiders elsewhere. But Sigfried knew he couldn’t take them anywhere. Spiders were the apotheosis of wild nature, untamed, unrestrained hunters. To try to control them would be to try to play god, and Sigfried wasn’t about to dabble in that sort of thing. His orb-weavers and black widows and other miniature beasts brought him a certain comfort. It was his belief they enchanted him with gifts of a transcendental nature, though he would never discuss those gifts with anyone. With wet eyes he packed his bags and rode off on his scooter, into the dark of night, no fear in his heart as long as the pale moonlight poured over him.
Sigurd, always the deep feeler of the family, was troubled from youth by his first memory, the memory of mourning wood. At his dead brother’s funeral, he witnessed his grandfather give a heart touching eulogy in front of the family. As granddad’s eulogy ended, a bulge grew in Sigurd’s pants, a preposterous poking of penile shape. Sigurd was too young to understand the words his grandfather spoke, too young to know the meaning of death, too young even to form memories, yet this one somehow stuck to the crevices of his mind like fat hardened to a trucker’s loaded gut. From this point forward, when Sigurd mourned he also yearned. A sexual yearning that ignited his palms and his pores, turned him upside down with lust, and soaked him in tears of melancholy and sweat of desire. With a pairing of tragedy and arousal, there comes, as you might imagine, a great deal of sexual confusion. The signals of Sigurd’s body were  mixed up for as long as he could remember. When a sexual situation presented itself to him, as it rarely did, Sigurd found his emotions turned to a torrent of bleak, hopeless, despair. It’s all upside down and backwards, Sigurd often thought. And he was right.
One night, caught in the midst of his parents arguing about his recently departed brothers, Sigurd tried to remain calm and collected. But tempers were on fire that night, and hurtful things were said of all parties. Sigurd’s feelings were hurt. His insides were heavy with grief, and soon enough, his penis poked through the hole in his gym shorts, staring his father and his mother in the eyes, unafraid of confrontation. The embarrassing aspect of this only increased Sigurd’s displeasure, and a shockwave of sensuality moved through his body as he ejaculated upon the faces of his loudly arguing parents. It was only minutes before Sigurd was out the door with a bag over his shoulder, ready to live elsewhere.
The mobile home was small, but with two bedrooms it was more than enough room for the brothers. Sigmund often went shirtless when his girlfriend Tan was staying over. Sigfried went shirtless as well, hoping Tan would take a liking to his greased chest and waxed abs. Sigurd’s shirt always stayed on to cover his pale skin, his fifth nipple, and his lack of a tan, something he figured Tan might be offended at if she saw, given her name.
It was Saturday night. Everyone was home, even Tan. Sigurd sat in his room stapling bells into his sports coat for church the next morning. The sound of his brother’s voice from the other end of the home bothered him.
“Tarantulas are everywhere,” Sigfried giggled, sitting on the living room floor. “The floor is covered with ‘em. But the nice thing is you can turn ‘em on or off. If you turn ‘em off, they just become scorpions.” With little effort, Sigfried saw scorpions covering the floor, crawling over his legs, giving birth to hundreds of miniature scorpion babies to populate the carpet. “But I like tarantulas for their hair.” The scorpions became tarantulas again, hundreds of them crawling slowly across the floor, many exploring his body like the hands of a new lover. “Someday I’ll ride in a chariot made of scorpions, pulled by one giant tarantula.”
             Sigmund and Tan were sprawled on the couch, half naked, fully baked, smiling at Sigfried’s writhing body in front of them.
            “Boy sees spiders where they ain’t even at,” Sigmund removed his tongue from Tan’s neck long enough to say. His gut made the perfect pillow for Tan’s perfect 2 body.
            The sound of jingle bells filled the mobile home’s hallway as Sigurd walked into the living room. “What’re you guys doin’?”
            “You got them bells on your coat,” Tan said. “Lookin’ good!”
            “I’m ‘bout to go see  Jonathan,” Sigurd said, wiggling his arms to test the jingle-jangle of his bells. “Anyone wanna go?”
            Sigfried rolled on the floor, shouting laughter into the beige carpet. He raised his hand to show interest in going.
            “Naw!” Sigmund shouted. “Sigfried’s too high on widow’s poison to visit. He gotta stay here.”
            “I don’t think I wanna go alone,” Sigurd said, pressing his hands over his freshly belled coat.
          “Sigurd’s gonna bring his journal to the cemetery and ask Jonathan for girl advice,” Sigmund said to Tan, his tongue back in her ear as soon as the last word left his lips.
            Tan laughed.
            “No,” Sigurd said. “I just want to ask him about the gates of Heaven and some other general stuff. Before church.”
            “I’m not too drugged to go,” Sigfried said, sitting straight up. His hair was a mess, and his eyes were red, but he otherwise looked fine.
            “Can we take your car, Sigmund?” asked Sigurd. “My bike’s locked in Rooster’s garage and he ain’t gonna be home ‘til tomorrow.”
            Sigmund threw his car keys to Sigurd. He cupped his hands around the handles of fat on Tan’s sides. She squealed like a pig.

***
           
            Sigurd and Sigfried walked through Green Seasons Memorial Park while the dry midnight air rushed around them like the breaths of ghouls out for an evening haunt. Sigurd’s bells jingled with each step. Sigfried drank water from a flask pulled from his back pocket. He looked at the ground as he walked, hoping to see a spider crawl across his feet, or to spot the small home of a funnel-web dwelling friend. Jonathan’s grave was ahead. Sigurd stopped and stood a body length away from the tombstone as Sigfried sat down in the grass. The night was quiet. Crickets chirped. There was even a bird at one point.
            Sigurd opened his coat and pulled out a notebook.
            “Brought your journal!” Sigfried yelled. “You dick!” He laughed at his brother of equal age and sipped on his water.
            “Jonathan,” Sigurd said, ignoring his brother, “there’s someone in my life I want to form a relationship with. I think I love her. I’ve come for your words of wisdom.”
            Sigfried appeared amused, and laughed into his flask. “Jonathan must hate you.”
            Sigurd opened his journal and took out a pen. “Lay it on me, brother,” he whispered.
            A woman’s voice came from behind them. They spun around in unison to see a shadowy woman standing below a tree, out of the moon’s bright bath of light.
Sigurd slammed his journal closed and put it inside his coat. “Olynda,” he said. “My, you’re looking good tonight.” He smoothed his coat and straightened his posture. The bells on his coat glistened in the moonlight.
            “Sigurd and Sigfried, is that you?” the woman said. “How are you?” She stepped forward, out from the shadow of the tree.
            Sigfried stood up and slid his flask into his pocket. “Damn, Olynda.”
            “Hello, Sigfried,” she said, still looking at Sigurd’s face.
            “Hey, baby,” Sigfried said. “You still seventeen?”
            “You mean am I still the age I was nine years ago?” She faced Sigfried and looked disappointed.
            “What? Naw, how old are you, hun?”
            “I’m twenty six, Sigfried.”
            “Cool, cool. You wanna grab somethin’ to eat later?”
            Sigurd interrupted. “Shut up Sigfried. Olynda, I didn’t think I’d see you here. What’re you doin’ in a graveyard at midnight?”
            “I came to see your brother,” she replied.
            “Huh?” Sigurd looked at Sigfried.
            “No, your other brother.” She pointed to Jonathan’s grave. “You told me about your relationship with him. Said he was your favorite brother. I’ve been coming here for months, a few times a week. Always too shy to go over and say hi, though. After all the things you said about him I didn’t know what to say.”
            Sigfried frowned. Sigurd still stood stiff, and walked closer to Olynda. “Would you like to meet him?”
            “You kiddin’?” Sigfried asked. “Sure you are.”
            Olynda smiled. “I hoped you’d ask.”
            Sigurd took Olynda by the hand and walked her closer to Jonathan’s grave. He began talking to her about Jonathan’s otherworldly all-knowing, and the relationship the brothers shared. As he spoke, Sigfried couldn’t hear what was said. He was coming down now. The drugs seemed to be wearing off. His head was clear and his heart’s pace slowed to a healthy beat. He walked next to Sigurd and Olynda.
            “That girl you want a relationship with,” Sigfried said. “Is it Olynda? Jonathan thinks it is. I do, too.”
            Sigurd became silent and looked at his brother. His stare said devilish things and hateful things, but his mouth was quiet.
            Olynda looked at the brothers. “What’s this? What’s he talking about?” She grabbed Sigurd’s arm.
            “Show her your journal!” Sigfried suggested. “I bet you got poems about her.”
            “Nah, there’s nothing like that in there,” Sigurd sheepishly said. “I mean, I don’t got a journal or nothin’.”
            “Yeah you do!” Sigfried pushed Olynda aside and pulled Sigurd’s coat open. The brothers wrestled for a moment as Sigfried forced his hands toward the inside pockets, reaching for the journal. The bells on the coat jingled as they wrestled. Sigurd was weaker than his brother and was soon overpowered. Sigfried pulled the journal away with him as he rolled backwards on the ground.
            “Give it back!” Sigurd yelled.
            “Yes, give it back!” Olynda said.
            “Just a minute,” said Sigfried. “Jonathan, I think Sigurd’s in love with Olynda, here. She’s the one. What should we do?”

***
           
Sigmund and Tan were naked in bed with sweat dripping from their whale-like bodies. Each emitted heavy moans as their hands glided unguided over one another’s skin. The springs of the bed beneath them warned of structural failure. Tan lurched her head up and sipped Coca-Cola from a long straw hanging over the bed. The brown stream flowed  through the straw, following loops and complicated paths from a bucket on the floor. The Coca-Cola was almost gone. Sigmund tilted his head back and sipped on the straw when she released it to get the final mouthful of Coca-Cola. He licked his lips. He had homework due Monday morning in his Intro to Phonetic Speaking class. A speech about personal relationships. Nothing had been written. This realization hit him as soon as the Coca-Cola hit his stomach. He rolled out of bed and cut the beached-whale lovemaking session short to a little vocal opposition from Tan, who’d waxed her hips just for this.
            “My speech ain’t gonna write itself, darlin’,” Sigmund said. He walked out to the living room to use the home’s only computer.
           “Sure is hard lovin’ an academic man,” Tan said to herself as she rolled out of bed.

***

            At first, Mom and Dad celebrated their sons’ departures by throwing yogurt and finger-foods parties in their newly emptied home every night. Their friends brought so many flavors  into the house it was as if Sweet and Salty met in a deserted warehouse and fisted each other’s faces to produce a smorgasbord of tastes. But soon they grew lonely. The absence of their boys left them with only each other’s company, a curse so vile it drew them to the edge of sanity’s cliff. Rounding up the boys and bringing them home wasn’t the answer. No, their bedrooms had already become a meat locker, a doll graveyard, and a museum of the boys’ baby teeth and hair and the broken condoms that led to their conception. The boys never called. Never wrote. Never visited. They lived many miles away and not a peep was heard from them since they left. Did they forget about ol’ Mom and Dad? It seemed so.
            “All we want’s a little recognition,” Dad said, a phone to his ear. “Garlilah and I miss the boys, but we don’t want ‘em back. We just want ‘em to remember where they came from. You know, show us they love us. Send us postcards or money or pay stubs.”
            Dad’s wife, Garlilah, also known as Mom, nodded while her husband spoke. The smoke from the cigarette in her mouth filled the kitchen, and its ashes fell into the potato salad she was stirring. It was almost time for dinner.
            “Just do what you do best, Pop,” Dad said. “They ain’t seen you in twenty years. They ain’t gonna remember you.” He hung up the phone and sat at the dinner table.
            “Your dad gonna take care of it?” Garlilah asked, still stirring the potato salad, ashes and all.
            “I reckon so,” Dad said. “When’s dinner? Smells like a fresh sewer in here.”
            “Soon, Fenton,” said Garlilah. “Soon.”

***
           
“Jonathan says there’s no hope for you, Sigurd,” said Sigfried, sitting on top of Jonathan’s tombstone, reading through his brother’s journal. “You got it bad.”
            Sigurd shook his drooping head, kicked the dirt, and looked up at Olynda. In the glow of the moon Olynda could see Sigurd’s face blush red. He sure was handsome. With a face red like that, he was even cute. Probably a good kisser, too. His hands had always been small, but Olynda could tell they would feel nice on her back, even her chest. She could tell Sigurd was a sensual person when he wanted to be.
            “He didn’t say that,” Sigurd replied. “I didn’t hear it. He said you need to get off his rock and respect me.”
            “No, he’s sayin’ I need to read him your journal entries. Here’s the latest. Oh, it’s a long one!”
            Sigurd surrendered to Sigfried’s will and avoided eye contact with Olynda. Olynda kept her eyes on Sigurd, for he was a sight that quenched her eyes’ thirst.
            “My story is best told by an impersonal third person narrative,” began Sigfried, reading aloud. “From a voice not sympathetic nor introspective. It’s just a story, after all. Not a song or a poem. This is not the way my story will be told. I will tell it myself, as it happens.”
            Sigfried looked up from the page. “Good God, Sigurd. What shit is this?” He continued. “Here we are, the two of  us. What fun times we’re having together. Don’t we always have fun times when we go out? Yes, certainly we do. This time is just like every other time. Although you may not know it, the sequence of events is the same.
            “An hour before I came to see you I fell into a state of emotional paralysis. It happens every time. It means my insides become a void where emotions go to die, where a black hole consumes and destroys all traces of stupefying laughter that bounce around. But every trace of sadness disappears, too. All excitement or anticipation have turned to hollow dread that guts me deep and leaves me unable to feel anything but a nagging, stabbing tingle of nerves and anxiety.”
            Olynda was by now smiling a farmer’s daughter’s smile, the sort of smile a girl might smile when flattering poetry is whispered into her good ear. Sigurd continued to look down, accepting that this would be his night of shame.

***

Tan walked to the middle room of the mobile home to see Sigmund watching couple’s S&M videos and a family bestiality video she recognized, called Bestial Cravings, in the picture-in-picture at the bottom of the screen. His face was wet with tears, his pants barely unzipped. Tan set a Bud Light on the desk beside him and didn’t say a word. She sat down on the couch and lit a cigarette. Sigmund’s sniffling was inaudible below the sound of a man being whipped by a masked woman in leather. He took a sip of Bud Light.
Tan closed her eyes, spread her legs, and slid her hand up her inner thigh. A violin played a haunting solo behind her eyes, its tempo increasing with the beat of her heart. Her hand moved faster, back and forth, up and down, around and around, her fingers dancing a pauper’s jig around her privates. It was as if at any moment an orchestra would begin accompanying the violin in her head, but she kept a steady pace, allowed her stimulation to reach a plateau before diving into the final movement. That’s when it happened. The orchestra burst in, horns and strings and timpanis and woodwinds backed the violin’s furious screech until climax. Tan let out a brief scream and it was over. Before her eyes opened a different kind of horn sounded. This one sounded real, not of her sexual imagination. And not of the  musical sort, but of the deep, troubling sort. The kind of horn an 18-wheel semi-truck might sound on the interstate. And once more it blared out.
Tan’s eyes opened. “The fuck is that?” she shouted.
Sigmund fell out of his chair and zipped up his pants. “Nothin’,” he said. “Watchin’ a wedding.”
“Not that. Outside.” Tan stood up and went to the window, peering into the front lawn. “Motherfuck. Sig, there’s a truck in the yard. A big ol’ truck.”
“What kinda truck?” Sigmund asked, standing up slow.
“I said a big ol’ truck.”
“Kick ass. I always wanted a truck. You think I can fit a boat in the back?”
“ I ain’t a truck stop gal. I don’t know. Come see for yourself. You  ain’t even got a boat! ”
“Thinkin’ about getting’ one,” Sigmund said as he walked to the window. “Hot shit, that’s a semi. Givin’ me a semi, if ya know what I mean.” He winked at Tan and rubbed her belly.
“Someone’s getting’ out,” Tan said, her cigarette about to fall out of her mouth.
“Old man looks lost,” Sigmund said. “Really, though, I was just watchin’ a friend’s wedding.”
“What’s that in his hands?”
Sigmund squinted his eyes out the window. “Looks like a shotgun.”
“What do you suppose he’s gonna do with it?”
The old man fired the gun into the air.
“Fuck!” Sigmund rolled to the ground and covered his head with his arms. Tan backed away from the window and dropped her cigarette on the floor.
“Siggy, what’s he want?”
“I don’t fucking know, woman!”
Another shotgun blast rang out. “Get out here, little shits!” The old man’s voice was like an empty toolbox.
“Think he’s talkin’ to us?” Tan said.
“Go out and ask him,” Sigmund said. “I’ll wait here.”
“Fuck no, Siggy.”
Another shotgun blast. “You got ten seconds!”
Sigmund hurried to his feet and opened the front door. His hands flew into the air. “Don’t shoot!” Tan followed him, her hands also in the air.
The man was pushing 80 at least, but was large and imposing in stature. “Where’s the rest of ‘em?” he asked. “Get ‘em out here.”
“No one else inside, sir,” Sigmund said.
“Just the two of ya?” the man asked.
“Just us,” Tan said. Then she started to cry.
“Where the fuck they at!?” the man shouted.

***

These aren’t bad things, to feel this way,” Sigfried read in a mocking tone. “They’re good things. The feel of sudden death makes me feel alive. That you’re the one person who can make me feel like this says a lot about the power you hold. You’re someone special.”
            “Sigurd,” Olynda said, shyly. “Did you write that?”
            Sigurd nodded.
            Sigfried continued. “Now that we’re hanging out I’m having such a nice time. It couldn’t be better. I couldn’t be happier. There’s nowhere I’d rather be. There’s no one I’d rather be with. We’re talking about all sorts of things, all over the board! Great conversations, great catching up, and our drinks go forever!”
             “You write like one of them wig-wearin’ guys who write with feathers,” Sigfried said. “I could stare at you for hours, but I won’t. I’m just stealing friendly glances, smiling, having a nice time. It’s so nice you aren’t ashamed to be seen in public with me. It makes it seem like you might enjoy this, too. But I know you’re just being nice.”
            Olynda stepped closer to Sigurd.
            “Tonight, when we part ways and I ride my bike home, I’m overcome with the same breathless disappointment and  self loathing. It always comes after you depart. There’s a ball of melancholy in my chest while I ride home with my headphones on. I hope on the street a car hits me and sends me flying off my bike, into a ditch, and I die there, cut up and bruised. I think of all the things I did wrong.”
            Sigfried started to laugh. “Goddammit. You must cry a lot when no one’s looking. I gotta let Sigmund see this shit.” Sigfried coughed. His eyes went wide. “Hm. Oh boy. I think the drugs ain’t done with me.”
            The sound of an enormous engine rumbled in the distance, and Olynda and the brothers became quiet. Blinding headlights appeared in the fog, racing toward them. The ground-clouds dispersed to reveal a semi-truck barreling toward the graveyard, along the dirt road leading to the gate. The gate crashed open, and the semi truck stopped just short of running over the graveyard’s only visitors.
            Olynda ran back to the tree and jumped into its branches, screaming, “Ho’mygod, ho’mygod, ho’mygod,” as she ran.
            “Is this happenin’, or is this drugs?” Sigfried asked, his eyes bloodshot and his hands shaking.
            “This is not drugs,” Sigurd said.
            The driver’s side door on the truck flew open and the old man stepped out, shotgun in hand, and he walked to the back of the truck to open the trailer. Sigmund and Tan stepped out. The old man motioned for them to follow him. He walked closer to Sigurd.
            “Evenin’ boys,” the old man said. “Gonna bust ya up with ma’ Remington.”
            “Us?” Sigurd asked. He looked at Sigmund and Tan, then at Sigfried. “Why?”
            “Ya got slimy faces and diseased bellies,” the man said, following it with a wheezing laugh that seemed to taint the air with a fishing boat’s aroma. “Remington’s hungry for some shootin’. I like to kill with mah Remington.”
            “He been talkin’ about his Remington all the way over here,” Sigmund said. “We could hear it in the back.”
            “Shut yer mouth, boy,” the old man said, pointing the gun at Sigmund. “I’ll blast that gold chain right off yer neck, n’ take yer head with it.”
            Sigmund took the gold chain off his neck and threw it on the ground at the man’s feet. “Take it!” he said.
            “Don’t want yer fuckin’ gold, boy. Keep it.” The old man fired the shotgun into the air and everyone ducked, and covered their ears.
            “Betcha wish yer moms was here now, dontcha, boys?” the old man said. “Momma and papa, right? Wish ya had that teet to suckle up to, and yer old man’s hairy chest to cuddle up with. Maybe a nice kiss on the cheek from the both of ‘em, to keep ya safe.”
            The brothers looked at one another, Sigfried only barely aware of the situation, and all shook their heads to disagree with the old man.
            “Well, they ain’t here!” the old man shouted. “Too bad, ain’t it!” He fired another shot into the air, toward the tree. Something fell from the branches. “I’m comin’ atcha like a hundred mile an hour fastball!”
            “Oh my God!” Sigurd shouted, running to the tree. “You shot her!”
            Olynda lied on the ground, a sizeable wound in her leg. She screamed a banshee’s wail as she bled.
            The old man gasped and ran to her side. “My Lord! Olynda!”
            “Are you her father?” Sigurd asked, shouting over Olynda’s screams. He knelt by Olynda’s side.
            “Father?” the old man muttered. “Boyfriend.” He dropped his gun and embraced Olynda. “Don’t worry, honey. We gonna getcha to a hospital.”
            Sigurd stepped back. “Her boyfriend? You mean her grandma’s boyfriend?”
            “Her fuckin’ boyfriend, Sigurd! You shit! I ain’t her dad. Hell, I’m yer fuckin’ granddad. Howdy ho, ya little fuck. Now help me pick her up.”
            “This is like a grief explosion all over my face,” Sigfried said, his eyes bloodshot, nodding his head in a circle.

***
           
            The semi-truck roared down the interstate with the old man at the wheel. “Keep pressure on the leg, son,” he told Sigurd, who held his hands at Olynda’s leg. She was placed in the middle seat, between the two. Sigfried, Sigmund, and Tan were in the back, holding on for life as the truck burned rubber.
            “What were you firing that gun off for? You trying to kill us? What the fuck, old man?” Sigurd seemed angry.
            “Call me grampa. Don’t you remember me, boy? You boys was young when I last saw ya, took ya on the sailboat and showed ya how to fake a pregnancy. I’m the one who got yer dad the job writin’ subtitles for the black characters in Hollywood movies. I’m connected.  Looks like ya grown up, some. Listen, I was only tryin’ to scare ya back there. You and yer brothers. Yer parents wanna see ya. Miss the buncha ya awful bad.”
            “I can’t go back,” Sigurd said, one hand holding Olynda’s hand, the other holding her leg. It was the first time he’d touched her, and he was touching her with both hands. It was nice, even considering the circumstances. “I came in pop’s face. Mom’s too.”
            “Boy, that’s coward talk and you know it. Maybe—wait, hold up.” The old man pulled his Remington shotgun off the floor of the truck and rolled down the window. A pickup truck had just merged into his lane. “Christmas time, ol’ boy!” the old man shouted. He stuck the shotgun out the side of the truck and blasted a hole in the bed of the pickup. It swerved quickly out of his lane and into a darkness beyond the old man’s field of vision or field of concern. He set the shotgun back on the floor. “Maybe you came in ya parents’ faces, maybe ya embarrassed yaself. But you know what? You stop givin’ a fuck about that and start worryin’ about the bond of family.”
            The old man’s words  drifted through Sigurd’s head while he watched his hand grow red from Olynda’s blood. She was getting light headed, seeming to drift in and out of consciousness. She hadn’t been screaming for a good five minutes. Maybe the pain had started to disappear.
            “How long have you and Olynda been together?” Sigurd asked.
            “Seems I oughta ask you the same thing, Sigurd,” the old man replied. “You got a heartbeat for her. I can tell. Ain’t no boy gonna let himself get bloody from a girl he don’t fancy. I know, ‘cause I was a boy once.”
            Sigurd looked the old man in the eyes, but the old man’s eyes were looking forward, angry at the road, so it hardly mattered. “That doesn’t answer my question.”
            “The girl and I been seein’ each other a couple months, now. Met her at the graveyard. I come see Jonathan from time to time. She was there, sittin’ under that tree just starin’ at his tombstone. I come by to put a bottle of wine at Jonathan’s grave and she’s askin’ me if I’ll introduce her. I says no, explain it’s a family thing, but I introduce myself to her. We get to talkin’ and one thing led to another and we started kissin’. Girl’s got a tongue like a Cincinnati racehorse. Knows how to use it, too. Was hopin’ she’d make me young again.”
            Sigurd blushed and shook his head. Olynda’s grip on his hand started to loosen. Her eyes darted from side to side. Stay with us, Sigurd’s eyes seemed to say. I’m trying, Olynda’s eyes seemed to say.
            “Got her pregnant, actually,” the man said. “Had an abortion. We don’t tell her parents that. But they know we fuck.”
            “I don’t really want to hear anymore,” Sigurd said. The rest of the ride to the hospital was silent except for the times the old man fired his shotgun at cars.

***
           
            Fenton’s lips caressed Garlilah’s hips, and echoed guitar chords played through their childless home. All the lights were off and for the first time in months, the two were intimate. As Fenton’s pants dropped to the floor the phone rang.
            “Let the machine get it,” Garlilah said.
            “I’ll show you a machine,” Fenton said.
            As the call went to the answering machine, Fenton’s father’s voice blared through the kitchen.
            “Fenton, this is Pop. There was a problem. We’re at the hospital now. Ya know how the Remington gets. Bye.”
            “He shot the boys!” Garlilah and Fenton yelled, simultaneously.
           
***

Sigmund, Tan, and Sigfried laughed in the trailer.
“And here’s the last part,” Sigfried said, reading from Sigurd’s journal. “The next day I’ll be consumed with a feeling I don’t like. Like I’m mourning something that’s lost. I’ll be silent and sick all day, ready to vomit at a moment’s notice. I won’t have an appetite. Even music sounds like shit. Days will go by and this feeling will diminish. I’ll return to normal, I’ll talk to friends again, I’ll get back to sewing and cross-stitching. But I’ll think of you often, and remember the last time we hung out. I’ll look forward to when we see each other again. I’ll hope for things that I know won’t happen. I’ll think nice thoughts and turn into an awkward little boy when I talk to you again. I’ll continue with my life and hope I see you soon.
Laughter carried through the trailer.
“What a goddamn idiot,” Sigmund said. “Sigurd oughtta write soaps.”
“It ain’t good enough to be soaps, Sigmund,” said Tan. “Soaps are good, this ain’t.”
Sigfried set the journal down. “Man… I… hmm…” he pushed his hand through his hair.
“Drugs still goin’?” Sigmund asked.
Sigfried nodded.


***

            “Which one of you did he shoot!?” Fenton yelled as he stormed into the emergency room. But only Sigurd and his father were there.
            “Oh my God!” Garlilah cried. “Sigmund and Sigfried!” She did the sign of the cross and tears ran down her face.
            “Naw, neither of ‘em,” the old man said. “Shot mah girlfriend. She’s in with the doctors now, gettin’ all fixed up.”
            “Where are your brothers?” Fenton said to Sigurd.
            “Awe shit,” the old man said, running out of the room. “Left ‘em in the back of the truck! I’ll be right back.”
            “How are you, Sigurd?” Garlilah said. “It’s been so long!”
            “It’s been a week, Ma,” said Sigured, unable to look either parent in the eye.
            “Son, I know you’re embarrassed about the cum.” Fenton turned on his best father-to-son voice. “But we’re past that. We want you to be past it, too.”
            Sigurd stood up and faced his parents. “I’m so sorry.” He tried to smile. They came in for a hug that Sigurd hesitantly accepted.
            Double doors flew open and a doctor covered in blood walked out at a brisk pace. “Hello,” he said, pulling the mask down from his face. “We couldn’t save her. She bled out. I’m sorry. We did what we could. We will be contacting the girl’s parents. If you’d like to see the body, follow me.” He turned around and walked back through the double doors.
            Sigurd’s eyes teared up. “No! No!” he shouted. “Shit…”
Fenton noticed the bulge in Sigurd’s pants. “My god! Garlilah, down!”
But it was too late. Sigurd achieved a level 9 orgasm that rocketed through his jeans, blasting Mom and Dad in the face, and sending him into the wall. The force was so great he could make no attempt to tame it. His parents were soon covered, and so were the four strangers who shared the emergency waiting room with them.


The old man ran to the back of the trailer hitched to his truck and unlocked the padlock.
“Sorry, fellas!” he shouted as he opened the door. Expecting to be met by his grandson’s and a whale of a potential daughter-in-law, he was instead met by thousands of black scorpions crawling along the floor, walls, and ceiling of the trailer. Sigmund and Tan soon ran out, covered in stings that bled from their limbs.
“Grampa!” shouted Sigmund, falling to his knees. “Sigfried’s made ‘em real. The scorpions! Awe, god. Something’s happened. They’re real.”
Tan fell to the ground in obvious pain, crying out into the hospital’s moonlit parking lot.
“Lucky for the two o’ you, we’re at a hospital,” said the old man. He looked in the trailer for Sigfried.
Scorpions poured from the trailer in a swarming black mass, and the old man mostly ignored them as they scuttled past his feet and into the cool night air. Prey was out there, and they would find it.
Sigfried walked forward from the shadows. Scorpions crawled all over his body but not a wound was on him. His face was beaming with pride and the gleam of accomplishment. His eyes  were red as blood. He clutched Sigurd’s journal in his arms.
“They’re real, old man,” Sigfried said. “I always knew they were.” He walked out of the trailer.
The old man nodded at the boy as he walked past, and made sure not to step on any of his scorpions. The boy’s tapped through, he thought. His ability shines like a beacon. A psychic beacon.
From across the parking lot a cry was heard, and Sigurd came running toward the group, the bells on his coat heralding his approach like a siren. As he came closer it became clear he wasn’t going to stop. He just kept running. His pants were at his ankles.
Not far behind him were Fenton and Garlilah, wearing scrubs, and wiping something from their eyes.
“The fuck was that?” the old man asked. “The boy seems a lil’ upset.”
“The girl died,” Fenton said. “Sigurd had a crush on her. She bled to death, and, well, he ain’t takin’ it so well.”
“What on God’s green earth!?” Garlilah shouted upon seeing Sigmund and Tan lying on the ground, surrounded by thousands of fleeing scorpions.
“Looks like yer boy Sigfried over there made some friends. Literally made ‘em, know what I’m sayin’?”
Sigfried spun in circles while scorpions crawled on his body. He hummed tender notes to the sky.
Sigurd tripped on his pants and fell face first into the concrete of the parking lot. Fenton and the old man ran to him.
“You alright, son?” Fenton asked. “Don’t worry about, uh, inside. I know you’re upset.”
“Sigurd,” the old man said. “I see yer pretty down about this girl dyin’. Listen, though. Last time we fucked, she said your name. She called me by it. Swear to God. She said, “Sigurd go deep, go real deep!” I know she was thinkin’ of ya.”
Sigurd turned his scraped up face to the old man, wiped the tears from his eyes, and forced a whimpering smile. “Really?”
“I said ‘Swear to God’. I don’t swear for nothin’.”
Garlilah ran to Sigurd’s side. “My boy! Are you alright? All my babies are hurtin’!”
“He’ll be fine,” Fenton said. He grabbed the old man by the arm and pulled him away. “Dad. You were fuckin’ that girl in there? What the hell?”
“Aw, no way,” said the old man. “My dick ain’t worked in decades. Just tellin’ the boy a few lies. Tryin’ to make it easier on him when she passed, is all.”
“What do you mean?”
“Oh, the girl was no good. Olynda was her name. Never met her before in ma life, but Jonathan told me all about  her. Just about the time I showed up to scare yer kids shitless, ol’ Jonathan starts rattlin’ off his streaming lines of psychic warnings. Says “there be a girl in that tree! Blast her down!” So’s I did. Hit her right in the leg. But goddammit if Sigurd wasn’t in love with her. Jonathan filled me in on the rest and I played my part. Had to be done, I s’pose.”
“Why the hell’d you shoot her, Pop?”
“She had bad intentions for the boy. Wanted to hurt him somethin’ fierce. Jonathan said so.”
“Jonathan’s dead, Pop.”
“I know.”
“The boys all think they can speak to him, but they can't.”
“They can’t,” said the old man. “But I sure as fuck can.”
           
Garlilah got the attention of a cluster of nurses inside the hospital who came to rush Tan and Sigmund away.
“I got a speech to write!” Sigmund yelled as he was pulled inside the hospital.
“My academic darlin’,” Tan could be heard saying as the doors closed.
“Sigfried!” Garlilah  screamed. “Why the scorpions?”
“They’re real, Ma!” he said. He stopped spinning and sat on the ground. The scorpions weren’t running around as they had been, and seemed lethargic. As he sat surrounded by scorpions, Fenton and the old man joined Garlilah.
“S’pose we oughtta get the boys back home,” said the old man. “Awfully late. Sigurd said they got church in the mornin’.”
“What will we do with all them scorpions, Pop?” said Fenton. “Can’t take them with us.”
            “I can take them,” Sigfried said. “I promised myself I’d never play god, but watch this.” He stood up, tucked his brother’s journal into the top of his pants, and closed his eyes. The scorpions moved in what appeared to be choreographed motion, climbing upon one another, taking positions on the ground, and forming a massive black shape with their bodies. Scorpions attached to one another to form large, upright circles, and others grabbed onto the massive shape to connect these circles.
            “My chariot,” Sigfried said.
            “Dear God,” Garlilah said, trembling. “The boy’s a demon. He need to go to church to be renewed.”
            “The boy’s an angel,” said Fenton, wiping sweat from his brow, obviously impressed.
            “The boy’s neither,” said the old man. “I’m getting’ outta here. Ya’ll are puttin’ me up for the night. I ain’t drivin’ all the way home.”
            “Who shall ride the chariot with me?” Sigfried said, as he climbed into the black swarm of scorpion creation.
            “I’ll go,” said Sigurd, pants-less, cut in the face, tears running down his cheeks. His bells jingled as he climbed onto the scorpion chariot. “And give me my journal. I have updates to make.”
            “I don’t think that’s wise, boys,” said Garlilah. “It’s just scorpions! It won’t move!”
            Wind rushed through the parking lot and the lamps flickered. A flash of light came in front of the scorpion chariot. When it cleared, a twenty foot long tarantula stood in the parking lot, brown hair on its legs and abdomen, and moonlight reflecting from its eyes. Scorpions from the scorpion chariot crawled up the tarantula’s back legs and formed a chain from tarantula to chariot. Sigfried threw his hands in the air to signal triumph, and commanded the beasts to take him and his brother home. The tarantula pulled the chariot at a speed that surprised Mom, Dad, and the old man. It crawled into the street and scampered away into the dark, the pitch-black chariot of scorpions pulled close behind.
              “We’re gonna see how Sigmund and Tan are doin’, Pop,” said Fenton. “And maybe wait around to see if Olynda’s parents show up. We’ll see ya at home.”
            The old man climbed in his truck as Fenton and Garlilah walked into the hospital. He set his shotgun on the seat in case he ran into any tarantulas on the road.

***

The tarantula-drawn scorpion-chariot stopped before a smoldering foundation where the mobile home had been. “They took our home,” said Sigfried, his hair a mess and his eyes in distress. “I dunno what to do.”
“No one took anything,” said Sigurd. “Looks like it burnt down. Everything’s gone. It don’t matter, anyway. Who needs a home when you ain’t got a heart left to live in it?”
“Everyone needs a home, Sigurd. Even the heartless.”
“Must have been Ma and Pa burned the place down,” said Sigurd. “Wantin’ us to move home.”
The brothers discussed their circumstances and argued about their next step. Sigfried was too high to understand any of Sigurd’s suggestions. Sigurd was too grief-stricken to care about Sigfried’s ideas, or his dazzling displays of sudden psychic abilities. The sun rose above the hills to the east as the brothers lamented into humid morning air. As Sigfried’s drugs wore off, the tarantula and scorpions relaxed. Fatigue seemed to pull them away from his grasp, and he grew tired as well. Sigurd hopped off the chariot of scorpions and looked at his watch. Church would be starting soon. He didn’t have pants, but he had his coat. That would do. He got to walking.

Bells rang as Sigurd walked up the sidewalk to the old brick Baptist Church he went to every Sunday and Wednesday since he could make his own decisions. Dehydrated and exhausted, his face scabbing over, he pushed his way through the doors and took a seat in the back. With no pants on the wooden pews felt cold against his skin. He hoped his coat would attract God’s eyes and ears. He prayed quietly while the preacher preached a Sunday parable to the yawning masses.
He prayed for God to hug Olynda and to cover her in holy kisses when she arrived to Heaven. He prayed for Jesus to be a good man to her, to never let his beard get too close to her soft cheek. He prayed that Olynda would meet Mary and form a friendship with her. The kind of friendship she would never have found on Earth. He prayed that when his grandfather died, he would be sent to Hell and kept as far away from Olynda as possible.
“I’ve got a prayer request, today,” said the preacher, after his sermon. “Sigurd Poppertawn has requested the church pray for him and for a woman named Olynda. Sigurd asks us to pray for Olynda to look deep in her heart and to accept Jesus as her savior, and then accept Sigurd as a lover.”
Sigurd shook his head at the preacher, waving at him, hoping to silence the man. “No!” Sigurd shouted. “It’s OK, really. That prayer request was from last week. I don’t need it, now.”
“Quiet, boy,” said the preacher, “This isn’t a call and response sermon.  You can preach when you got a congregation sittin’ in front of you. Why would you put in a request you don’t want? Maybe you don’t need it. But maybe Olynda does. Someday, God’s gonna want to place his magic fingers on her and check her for devils and demons. She’s gonna need the Lord’s holy residues on her before that day comes so he can take her into Heaven. We gonna pray for her real good. Everyone, I want a community prayer goin’ out to Olynda tonight. Everyone get by your bed, your couch, your bathroom door, and take a knee. Open your hearts and pray to the Lord that Olynda finds Jesus. Call out to her. Let her know you’re with her.”
The bells on Sigurd’s coat jingled through the church as he left the building. As the morning sun hit him in the eyes, he reflected that he’d always hated the idea of other religions existing, even other sects of Christianity. But maybe it was time to find a new church. His voice found itself muted enough at home. How was he supposed to get God’s attention with his voice muted in between the pews? That was the point of his coat. A beacon to draw attention to his needs. Jonathan’s advice made sense. It just didn’t seem to work. Maybe there weren’t enough bells.
Smells of toast and pancakes from the diner tempted Sigurd as he passed on his way home. He was too tired for breakfast. He would sleep by the ashes of his house. Maybe he would search the remains for old notes from Olynda, or a pair of pants.
As Sigurd walked through the diner’s parking lot, a Buick LaSabre pulled in front of him and stopped. The window on the driver’s side rolled down to reveal Sigmund’s smiling face.
“Hey brother,” said Sigmund, his face swollen and red with small wounds. “How was church? Want some breakfast?”
“Fine. And no. I’m goin’ home. Don’t really got an appetite.”
“Home’s gone,” Tan shouted from the passenger seat. Her face was also red, and her lips bulged like a balloon animal worm. “Fire got it.”
“I know,” said Sigurd. “Ma and Pa did it, I guess.” He stretched in his coat and pulled it down to cover his privates.
Exchanging glances, Tan and Sigmund shook their heads, then nodded, then tried to decide which to stick with. Nodding.
“Yeah,” said Sigmund. “Guess so. Probably wasn’t Tan’s smokin’. Ain’t never caused a fire before, anyway.”
“Come and eat with us, Sigurd,” Tan said, squeezing her lips together in the rearview mirror. “We just got outta the hospital."

The only empty table in the diner still had coffee stains on the fake wood surface, and maple syrup on the seats. Sigmund and Tan sat their swollen butts in one seat and Sigurd sat across from them. Syrup felt good on his bare skin.
“We’re gettin’ married,” said Sigmund, holding Tan’s swollen hand up, with a gold ring stuck over the tip of her finger, unable to be slid down any further. The tip of her finger was purple. “Proposed to her last night!”
Tan squealed a laugh that permeated the entire diner but didn’t draw the kind of attention she had hoped for. But she smiled.
“That’s really somethin’,” said Sigurd. “You guys will be happy.”
“Kinda a good thing the home went up in flames,” Tan said. “My daddy came by the hospital this mornin’. He was real happy to hear the news! Said he’s buyin’ us a house boat out on the river. Got three hundred horsepower, Sigurd. Big ol’ engines on it.”
“Always wanted a boat,” Sigmund said, wiping syrup off the seat and licking his swollen finger.
“But I ain’t happy the home is gone,” said Sigurd. “Where’m I gonna live? Or Sigfried?”
“Sigfried’s off with his spiders,” said Sigmund. “We just saw him by the house. Spiders built a big web in the trees and he’s sleepin’ in there. Scorpions, tarantulas, crabs, snakes, and stuff. All kinds of gross stuff. A big hole in the front yard, too. Looks like his big tarantula sleepin’ in it.”
“You could live with your grampa,” said Tan. “Or why not move back in with your parents?”
Sigurd stared at the table and shook his head. The coffee stains stared back.
A waitress walked to the table, short of breath, appearing to be in a hurry. “Mornin’ ya’ll,” she said. “Can I start you folks with some biscuits and gravy?”
Sigurd looked up to face the voice he recognized and looked into a black woman’s face. Sigmund shared his gaze.
The woman forced a smile and nodded. “How ya’ll doin’?” Disgusted by the condition of her customers, and recognizing the brothers from the county fair, she lost her enthusiasm for providing the quality service the diner was known for.
“Fine.” Sigurd lowered his head and rested his arms at his side in hopes his bells wouldn’t betray his nerves.
“We might need a minute,” said Tan. The waitress sighed, rolled her eyes, and left. 
“Sigurd,” Sigmund said, sudden enthusiasm in his voice. “I got it-“
“I know,” said Sigurd, with an air of confidence. “I think I’ll do it. I’ll sell myself on the black market. Hope a wife buys me up and gives me a place to live.”
“I was thinkin’ you could get a side of bacon and I’ll get a side of sausage so we can share. But that’s a good idea, too. Do whatever you want.”
“I ain’t livin’ with Mom and Dad again.”
“Ain’t no one gonna buy a white man for a husband, though,” Sigmund said. “Not even with all them bells.”
“I’d buy you,” said Tan, into Sigmund’s ear. She licked his swollen neck.
“You know I’d buy you, girl,” Sigmund  said, licking Tan's swollen lips.
“Someone will buy me,” Sigurd assured himself. “Jonathan says the market’s lookin’ for guys like me.”
Tan and Sigmund were kissing in their seat, tongues afire with animal desire, unaware of Sigurd’s words, and happy about the future. Sigurd waited for the waitress to return and thought that he, too, might be happy about the future soon. 

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